Suzanne Stone Maretto Needs Your Help! Again!

It's Round Two in the Sirens of the LAMBs contest wherein The Spoon's sponsored femme fatale, Suzanne Stone (To Die For), takes on Kyra (The Chronicles of Riddick).

Head over to the Large Association of Movie Blogs (LAMB) for the full match up, but here's a quick preview: Suzanne ensnares Kyra in a shopping frenzy gone sexily lethal while Kyra invokes her inner survivor to outlast Suzanne.

Voting ends Saturday afternoon so make certain you go vote now before Suzanne Stone has to teach you a lesson.

The Rolling Stones star in Shine a Light

Halfway through Shine a Light a reporter sticks his microphone towards Mick Jagger's baby-smooth face and asks the singer if he can imagine performing on stage when he's sixty. Without a hint of humor or cockiness The Rolling Stone's frontman replies, "Easily."

Warning: Staring at Mick Jagger's hips may cause impure dreams

Martin Scorsese inserts many such news clips throughout footage from two of The Stones' performances in New York City's Beacon Theater in late 2006. The result can barely be called a documentary because of its superficial nature that rarely delves deeper than Jagger and the band's wrinkled surface but the film nonetheless succeeds as an energetic tribute to The Stones' endurance and remarkable showmanship.

I can admit that I didn't know much Rolling Stones history walking into the theater and upon leaving I didn't know much more; Shine a Light isn't that kind of movie.

Even calling Shine a Light a movie is a bit of a stretch. The tagline on the film's poster reads "Experience it in IMAX" and "experience" is a far more accurate description of the film. Scorsese mercifully avoids a "Behind the Music" story arc and focuses primarily on the Stones' Beacon Theater performance and for the most part this works just fine, especially if you've never seen the band live and, even if you have, I guarantee that you've never seen them this close before.

Keith Richards looks fabulous for a ninety-four year old guy. Too bad he's actually sixty-four

Jagger, Richards, Watts, and Wood burst off the screen thanks to endlessly creative camera angles and borderline-obscene clarity. The camera work is akin to watching a Stones' live performance on a front row chair sprinkled in fairy dust that can swoop and float across the stage. The level of definition is equally incredible; close ups of Mick Jagger and Keith Richards' faces will leave you swearing you've accidentally wandered into a recreation of the moon landing.

But looking great is only one part of the equation and, thankfully, The Stones justify Scorcese's interest and prove they can still bring the noise. The band is loud and exhilarating and Mick Jagger is, bar none, the best sixty-something stage performer out there. He might not have the same vocal strength he used to, but his ability to prance and sing without degenerating into Darth Vader huffing is nearly as superb as his obvious physical conditioning. The man is ripped ten ways from Sunday.

Balancing out Mick Jagger's unnatural sinuous grace is Keith Richards' awkward "dance moves, " which include circling Ronnie Wood like a scuttling crab and flicking guitar picks into the audience. Meanwhile Charlie Watts never fails to look like a five-foot pole resides underneath his buttock and Ronnie Wood does his best Rod Stewart impersonation, but watching each band members' quirks is surprisingly entertaining.

Shine a Light would have been even more entertaining with additional archived footage to inject further texture into the performance. Martin Scorsese obviously wanted to make a film that was loud, fun, and easy to digest but he missed out on an obvious opportunity to give Shine greater staying power.

For example, Keith Richards sings vocals later in the set list. Musically, Richards' performance is the weakest portion of the concert and the film, but Scorsese offsets the lull by inserting more interviews. In one interview he and Ronnie Wood joke about who is the better guitarist and their banter flavors the glowing nods they threw each other while rocking out on stage. In another interview, Richards shies away from discussing his numerous addictions and dangerous lifestyle and credits his survival to luck. These snippets add extra wrinkles to The Rolling Stones' performance and infuse a greater sense of perspective and accomplishment. It's a shame more weren't included.

If you've already seen the Stones live or have watched a true documentary on the band's history then Shine a Light will no doubt prove a redundant experience. But if you've done neither, then do yourself a favor and check out Shine before it leaves theaters because it's almost, but not quite, as good as the real thing.

Head on over to the Large Association of Movie Blogs (LAMB) for more sites filled with movie reviews. Tell me them I sent you and you'll probably get kicked out so try to put in a good word for me.

Great Stubble in TV and Film

Dr. Evil once said "there's nothing like a shorn scrotum -- it's breathtaking." Now I don't want to get into a debate about the merits of hairless scrota (that could take hours) but I would like to honor those men who buck the shearing trend and make face whiskers look good.

In no particular order...

Patrick Dempsey (Grey's Anatomy) - Without any stubble, Dr. Derek Shepherd is simply a mild-mannered doctor with great hair. Add the grizzle and he's every woman's fantasy: a hottie doctor that she can pretend is also a bad boy. (Dr. Shepherd might actually be a bad boy; I don't know since I've never seen the show, but if I did watch it, it'd be because of the stubble -- and Katherine Heigl).

Kiefer Sutherland (24) - The Kief almost got onto this list with The Lost Boys, but the mullet doesn't age nearly as well as the face whiskers. Fortunately Jack Bauer is man enough to make the cut in between his hectic schedule of saving the country and serving jail time.

Don Johnson (Miami Vice) - Nobody has done more to further the cause of facial stubble while simultaneously retarding America's fashion sense. Don Johnson tried to recreate the magic years later in Nash Bridges but his second biggest mistake was leaving the stubble in the 80s (the biggest mistake was using the name Nash Bridges).

Zachary Quinto (Heroes) - Skylar figures to be one of the less conflicted characters in Heroes (kill, kill, absorb powers!) but Zachary brings "texture" to his role with a truly magnificent five-o-clock shadow. Watching him makes you wish you'd been blessed with such facial-growth powers.

Brett Favre - (NFL - Retired) When Brett Favre retired the NFL lost not only an iconic iron man but also the grizzliest face in the league. I dare you to find a picture of Brett Favruh without any stubble -- that photo does not exist. This man embodies all the qualities that facial stubble stands for with his toughness, recklessness, and never-say-die-ness.

Matthew Fox (Lost) - After watching Dr. Jack Shephard tramp about a mysterious island for the last few years wearing a luxuriant face rug, you might be tempted to chalk the perfect growth up to another strange island power. And then you'd look at Hurley. Jack's natural charisma is greatly enhanced by his scruff that lets his frightened followers know that, despite his Ivy League education and occasional aloofness, he's just as stinky as them.

Harrison Ford (Indiana Jones) - I've already expounded Indiana's Greatness here at The Spoon, but it bears repeating that Indy is the pinnacle, nay, the apotheosis, of every-man-ness. He's smart, funny, resourceful, compassionate and he knows how to handle a whip. His man-scruff simply drives home how comfortable he is in his own well-worn shoes. Truly, he is a role model for our times.

Dylan McDermott (Big Shots) - The McDermott take on face stubble manages to combine arrogance and disdain with a playful boyishness. I'm not really certain how he does it, but his character Duncan Collingsworth (the name even sounds pretentious) really should be an unforgivable a-hole but isn't. I think the love-able scruff is a big part of the reason why.

Hugh Laurie (House) - By far the ugliest growth on this list belongs to the character who is possibly the most brilliant. Dr. House understands that the best way to prevent your genius medical abilities from putting off people (remember, he's a teddy bear deep down inside) is to grow a "pubical" concoction on your face. It doesn't look good, which almost made me pull House from this list, but the faux-surly doc would fail to garner much sympathy without the scruff.

That's my personal list for the greatest stubble in TV and film but I'm sure I left out a bunch. Feel free to let me know who your nominations are by commenting below.

Also, check out the Large Association of Movie Blogs (LAMB) for a wide variety of, you guessed it, movie blogs about other fun movie topics and possibly even more facial stubble discussions (though I doubt it).

12:01: The Reality

You remember 12:01, right? The Jonathon Silverman vehicle of the early 90s that starred Silverman as an office worker who, through a fortunate accident, is the only person on the planet not caught in a time-loop that reboots everyday at 12:01am?

Even if you do remember that goofy, sci-fi flick, chances are you're unaware they're making a sequel -- but this time in reality. Dun dun dun!

Better watch all your favorite Jonathon Silverman movies before the world ends/gets caught in perpetual time-loops

According to an article in the New York Times, scientists from the European Center for Nuclear Research or CERN (which is most definitely an evil organization-sounding name if I've ever heard one) have spent 14 years and $8 billion dollars building the "Large Hadron Collider" (again, evil-sounding) which is designed to "recreate energies and conditions last seen a trillionth of a second after the Big Bang." Harmless enough, right?

But scientists like Walter Wagner and Luis Sancho are concerned that CERN hasn't taken the necessary safety precautions and believe the Large Hadron Collider could potentially produce a black hole. And not just the tiny kind that Stephen Hawking predicted would evaporate like a fart lit on fire, but a big, nasty one like a fart powered by cans and cans of refried beans and then lit on fire for all of eternity.

The scientist types are abuzz with black holes fears, but if I remember correctly the time-loop in 12:01 began with a similar experiment in particle collisions. Mmmmm.

So if in the future you notice that your day is repeating again and again 12:01 style, or you've been sucked into a nasty black hole, don't say I didn't warn you.

For more discussions about movie-related doomsday scenarios (not really) visit Large Association of Movie Blogs!

Looking Ahead: Baby Mama Preview

Tina Fey is no doubt one of the rising stars in comedy, not unlike a female Judd Apatow. Every one of Ms. Fey's projects, from Weekend Update at SNL, to Mean Girls, to 30 Rock, has sparkled with her whip-smart take on the absurdities of every day life. Her latest project, Baby Mama, is due out April 25th and I have no problem admitting that I'm interested in the flick despite its estrogen-heavy premise. Fey, a single woman desperate for motherhood, recruits a childish, none-too-bright girl (Amy Poehler) to be her surrogate.

I couldn't find a movie poster so this'll have to do. Oh well.

Reuniting Tina Fey and Amy Poehler is a no-brainer recipe for a sharp, snarky film but I'm not sure if the premise will prove adequately substantive for this talented cast (which also features Greg Kinnear, Sigourney Weaver, Romany Malco, and Dax Shephard - remember him?). Writer/director Michael McCullers is an SNL veteran but that's not necessarily a good thing in a movie director as most SNL movies tend to suffer from skit-itis and feel like a five minute skit stretched out to 105.

If anyone can play a semi-retarded surrogate who can't operate a child-proofed toilet it's Amy Poeher. She's got charm for days, but very few people outside of Will Ferrell can play semi-retarded goofballs for an entire movie and not incur viewer's eternal hatred. It's going to take strong performances by both Fey, Kinnear, and others to balance out the gross-out antics of Poehler's woman-child.



Despite these questions, Baby Mama is the only way to get a Tina Fey fix outside of reruns so I predict it'll do reasonably well in the box office. Personally, I'm not sold enough on the film to risk the social stigma of actually watching Baby Mama in the theaters with a pair of fully functional testicles.

What do you guys think of Baby Mama?

For more movie goodness check out the Large Association of Movie Blogs!

Vote Today! -- At The LAMB

The U.S. presidential elections aren't for a while, but that doesn't mean you can't get your vote on now.

I know I already used this picture but I still like looking at it

Over at The LAMB (Large Association of Movie Blogs), Suzanne Stone (To Die For) is fighting for her life against Zoe (Serenity). Help her kick some Firefly butt and give her your vote to send Suzanne into the second round to wreak her seductive brand of chaos.

The Spoon Prognosis: Healthy, Constipated

I'd like to calm any nervous readers out there: The Spoon is not on hiatus. However, The Spoon's chief operating station (ie: my computer) suffered through a medley of hiccups and coughs that took a couple of weeks to clear up. Everything has been successfully resolved and you can expect much more stuff to grace these virtual pages as I push out some creative backlog.

A podcast is in the works... but I probably shouldn't even be talking about it

One item to expect is an upcoming movie review which I've already begun podcasting about with my secret team. It's still early in development and I probably shouldn't even be talking about it, but I'm excited about the opportunity to branch out and touch you with my voice as well as my words.

Stay tuned.

Attack of the Femmes Fatales

Nick over at the LAMB page came up with a very interesting idea to pit cinematic femme fatales against each other in a single-elimination narrative battle style tournament. Each participant chooses a femme fatale from any movie and must explain why his/her siren would defeat the other. Obviously it's called "The Sirens of the LAMBS."

I'm participating, of course, so check back for an update when my femme fatale, Suzanne Stone Maretto from To Die For, takes on Zoe from Serenity. The rest of the competition is stiff as well and includes the likes of The Bride, Nikita, and Bonnie Parker among others.

The action will be hot, heavy, and most likely lethal. Check it out.

The Spoon... Podcast?

In my return to the basics ("Movies. Stuff. More Stuff.") I'm contemplating taking The Spoon onto some radiation waves some radio waves a podcast near you!

As part of that movement, I'll also be reintroducing non-Lost content back onto the site. I fully intend to complete my analysis of every major Lost character but I'll be interspersing it with other stuff. "What other stuff?" you may be asking yourself.

That's an excellent question.

My current vision for the site is to move towards shorter, more frequent posts about recent movies, classic movies, and, of course, Lost. I'll consider discussing other televisions shows but only if they feature time-warping islands and smoke monsters. The Spoon will continue to be gossip free and tuna safe.

I realize my vision is pretty hazy and that's partially intentional; I'm still figuring out what I'm going to do. The how of it is also something I'd like to bring up.

You may notice a new widget to the right of this post. I set up a small donation fund for The Spoon as a way of paying for tickets and other stuff (microphones, adapters, etc.) that will allow me to keep doing what I love: discussing movies and making a fool of myself.

Leave a comment if you have any ides or suggestions for the site and my possible podcast. Or you can email me at my brand new address inthespoon@gmail.com.

Lost Character Analysis Part 4

My mega Lost character analysis series continues today with Desmond Hume, but before I begin I’d like to make a few observations about Season 4’s Confirmed Dead episode. Expect spoilers so run over to ABC.com to watch the most recent episodes if you don’t want me to ruin your fun.

The second episode of the fourth season, Confirmed Dead, focused heavily on the introduction of four new characters and we’ve already been given brief glimpses of their recent pasts. If these characters were simply more castaways then I would question their addition but these four provide an entirely new slant on the same mysteries (Dharma Initiative, Ben Linus, polar bears) that we’ve already been pondering. And who’s that black dude working for Oceanic? I wouldn’t want to run into him in a dark alley but I’d sure like to ask him some questions. Obviously Oceanic knows more about the situation then they’re letting on.

According to Wikipedia the next several episodes will return focusing on our original Losties so Confirmed Dead brought us up to speed on the new guys and now we can take off running. My main complaint with the episode was that not a lot happened, but that’s an understandable obstacle when four new bodies have to be introduced and fleshed out.

"Do you have a wee bit o' toilet paper, brother? I got a 'fighter.'"

Desmond Hume – Speaking of Season Four, what the hell happened to Desmond? As far as I can tell he isn’t with Sayid and Jack’s bunch (though Wikipedia says that he is) and I don’t remember seeing him with Locke’s posse either. He’s something of a wildcard and that’s really been the case since the beginning.

Desmond was introduced in the topsy-turvy first episodes of season two as the man who continuously saved the world by entering the same sequence of numbers every 108 minutes. When his world-saving device was shot up he bolted and didn’t reappear until his sailboat returned as if he were sailing in a “snowglobe.”

If all that weren’t enough, Desmond appears to be clairvoyant since initiating the hatch’s fail safe mechanism. He helped Charlie avoid his death a number of times before helping him sacrifice himself to bring what they believed was a rescue attempt.

Desmond has received much less air-time than the other main Losties (Jack, Kate, Sawyer, etc.) but he’s proven to be no less important to their continued chances for survival. His history with his long-suffering girlfriend Penelope, who apparently will stop at nothing at finding him, as well as his connection with a number of other island folk (Libby) makes him feel like something of a plot device. A potential ace in the hole to bail writers out of jams and keep plots moving.

I do believe the writers have a far-reaching goal for Lost, but it doesn’t hurt having a guy who can “know” things he shouldn’t when you’re trying to handle as many loose threads as Lost tosses around.

I have absolutely no evidence to back me up on this, but Desmond is the type of character I would predict is inside that coffin in Jack’s flash forward. Desmond is somewhat removed from everyone and because of his clairvoyance he is always in a position to take incredible momentous actions and divide everyone’s feelings towards him. Of course, a ton of other people fit this role as well but Desmond isn’t the first person you’d think of which makes him the first person I do think of.

Biggest Questions: Where is he? What else does he know that he isn’t telling anybody? Will he ever reunite with Penelope? Will he be in the coffin and make me sound like a genius? Please?

My (noncomprehensive) Bucket List

I don’t usually write memes, much less memes about my own death, but I’ll make an exception at my blogging buddy Sarah’s request. This time.

I’m supposed to come up with a list of activities I’d like to do before I “kick the bucket” aka die a grisly death. I assume that’s what it means because I never actually saw The Bucket List. I’m planning to watch The Exorcist and Rosemary’s Baby first to get in the mood.

Me being me, I decided to change the rules. Instead of just writing about any old thing to do before croaking, I’m going to compose my list entirely of activities ripped out of movies. This is a movie-based blog after all and I should also note that I’m ignoring the laws of physics, good taste, and proper etiquette.

On to my (noncomprehensive) Bucket List:

Sweet Ride

- Ride a hover board (Back to the Future Part 2)
Michael J. Fox stole a pink board from a little girl in the future and ever since I saw that I too have wanted to steal a pink hover board from a little girl in the future.

- Eat colorful gruel (Hook)
Food that colorful has to taste good. But does it give a growing boy all the minerals and vitamins he needs? Will it prevent any scurvy relapses?

"Nice to meet you Elsa, but I have a man-date with Matt"

- Visit Venice with Indiana Jones (Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade)
I’m not proposing to take Dr. Elda Schneider’s place but I wouldn’t mind going on a pleasant man-date with Indy. I also wouldn’t be opposed to a gondola ride afterwards.

- Drape myself in velvet for one day (Seinfield)
I don’t particularly care for velvet but there must be a good reason why George Costanza wanted to wear it all day every day.

- Knock up Katherine Heigl and force her to marry me (Knocked Up)
Getting Katherine Hiegle to marry me does seem a bit far-fetched but it’s all part of my plan. If Katherine doesn’t work out then I would also accept Salma Hayek (Fools Rush In).

Consider yourself tagged if you want to write a movie-based Bucket List. But keep your mitts of Katherine and Salma – they’re both mine.

The LAMB Devours the Oscars

Check out some excellent previews of the upcoming Academy Awards over at the Large Association of Movie Blogs (LAMB). Each awards category (every stinkin' one!) has been covered by a LAMB member and the latest entry was written by yours truly.

I promise you won't not not be not loving it!

*Image used without permission from Large Ass. of Movie Blogs. I dare them to punish me.

Lost Character Analysis Part 3

My Lost character breakdown continues with Sawyer. The fourth season has already begun so let’s get this baby crackin’. (Also check out Parts 1, and Parts 2)

With the exception of these lenses, Sawyer gets my vote for
"best dressed on a deserted island"

James “Sawyer” Ford – Sawyer emerged early in the first season as the most naturally multi-faceted character on the island (with the possible exception of Locke), and a surprisingly likeable guy. For while Kate and Jack struggled with the consequences of crimes of passion and a lifetime of overbearing parenting, Sawyer’s hurts were at once more painful and more complex and how can you not root for the kid whose parents murdered/suicide-d each other?

Sawyer’s first major episode, Confidence Man, ranks among my favorites in the entire series. From the very first episodes the writers spent a considerable amount of time building up the mysterious back-stories of characters like Kate, Jack, and Locke. Sawyer seemed like a central character but he also seemed far more one-dimensional compared to his fellow Losties; he was obviously a con-man through and through. So when Confidence Man revealed exactly how Sawyer found himself on that road the effect was both unexpected and powerful. Josh Holloway also deserves major props for making Sawyer a bonafide a-hole and cocky bastard and still effectively communicate a(n) (occasionally) tender heart hidden underneath the slick exterior. I suppose he’s also kind of hunky if you’re into grizzled sneers and a well-defined rectus abdominis.

Season 2 and 3 kept Sawyer playing mostly to his character strengths as the bad boy dealing in quips and behind-the-scenes manipulation. His fighting exhibition while captive by the Others was a nice reminder that he had some bite behind his bark. I don’t think he belongs with Kate (they’re both too self-absorbed), but they’re chemistry as prisoners in captivity was undeniable.

Since returning to the camp Sawyer has acted a bit too much like a cat that’s been de-clawed. He gets manipulated by Hurley into acting nice and he spends his days playing ping-pong. I like seeing his softer side, but with the exception of his murder of Locke’s father – the man who conned his parents into death – Sawyer has effectively receded into the background.

In the first episode of Season 4 we saw Sawyer join up with Locke. We also heard Hurley say that following Locke was a mistake. It’s pretty difficult to figure out the specifics of that statement at this point, but since Hurley made it off the island with Jack and Kate then conceivably Sawyer could also be part of the “Oceanic Six.”

Biggest Questions: Did Sawyer make it off the island? Will he keep “surviving?” Did he knock up Kate? Will he end up with her? Will we ever get to see a flashback to a time when Sawyer paid for sex?
[To be continued]

Remembering Heath Ledger

Heath in happier times

I was going to write a post entitled 10 Things to Remember about Heath Ledger before I realized I didn't know 10 things about Heath Ledger to begin with. And that realization partly explains why his death is so tragic; Heath was one of the guys you didn't see in the tabloids or hear about in nasty rumors. He had a private life that seemed devoid of the indulgences and scandals so common with other young stars and starlets. Heath seemed like one of the "good guys."

I haven't seen Brokeback Mountain (though I plan to) but I know Mr. Ledger took his job seriously. I know he took roles like Casanova to keep his fans happy while he yearned to explore more complex characters. In the New York Times article describing his death, one of his quotes summed up his acting ambitions: there are many stories inside of me and a lot I want to achieve outside of one flat note.

The Dark Knight is due out this summer and by that time more information about the conditions surrounding Heath Ledger's death will be available. No matter what details may arise, nothing will prevent this from being a sad and tragic event.

Lost Character Analysis Part 2

I'm working my way through all the major Lost characters from A-Z (by last name). Check out Part 1 here. Now enjoy Part 2:

I wonder if I'd look that good after 48 days without a shower

Ana Lucia Cortez - In retrospect it's a little ironic that Michelle Rodriguez got to play a disgraced ex-cop, but she's made a career out of tough chick roles and the character of Ana Lucia was no big departure from her previous work.

Ana Lucia was at her best as the militant, tortured (slash torturer -- zing!) leader of the "tailies" in "The Other 48 Days." I'd even go so far as to say that that was one of my all-time favorite episodes because it captured much of the same horror and fear of the unknown that we saw in the original series pilot. In fact, "The Other 48 Days" may have been better than the pilot in some ways since it was like watching all of Season 1 condensed into a single episode and then mashed together with the violence of a survival horror flick. Ana Lucia was a great leader for the "tailies" because she seemed to have a bead on what was going on, but in reality she was as vulnerable as her less aggressive survivors and their dark fate was a nice contrast to the relatively easy-going existence of the "middlies."

I'm going to pause a moment here because I think the Season 1 version of the Others deserves special mention. Remember how they were barefooted boogeymen with super strength and a disturbing, but nameless, purpose? Back then the Others were almost like a physical manifestation of the island's strangeness -- made even more threatening than the smoke monster because the Others pretended to be like you.

It's pointless to imagine Lost going in another direction than the arrogant, talkative bunch they later morphed into but I still get shivers remembering the way Ethan looked at Claire with his dead, cold eyes before absconding with her and Charlie and then leaving him to test a tree branch's tensile strength with his neck.

Pause over.

Once Ana Lucia made it to the "middlie's" camp her character was pretty much dead in the water. Other than killing off dead wood like Shannon, she floated by on the periphery without making much of a splash except for that time she raped Sawyer. Good times.

Ana Lucia's backstory was never completed before her death at Michael's hands, but I don't see her contributing in any significant way in the rest of the series. R.I.P. muchacha.

Biggest Questions: Did she get caught for shooting that dude in cold blood? Does it even matter if she did? Do you miss the old version of the Others as much as I do?

Yeah, Michael Dawson rocks the man-bag.
And if you laugh at him he'll straight up sell you to the Others

Michael Dawson - I'll admit that I grew tired of Michael's oft repeated line: I want [gasp] [gasp] my son [sad eyes] back! [spittle leaks from mouth] so I was perfectly fine with his departure in Season 2.

Back in Season 1 I was never entirely satisfied with the Michael-Walt domineering parent dynamic, but at least their relationship progressed some (I'm looking at you Kate and Jack). And when we saw more of Michael's back story in which his wife forced him to give up custody of Walt, I actually developed a soft spot for Michael. Let's just say that my family's ties are pretty darn strong so watching Michael's wife ask him to give up his son and then suggest his reluctance was borne out of selfishness made my ears practically smoke. The nerve of that woman!

I also liked the emotional impact Michael suffered through in Season 1's cliffhanger when Walt was taken by the Others. Like I said before, this was back when the Others were mysterious and threatening and "Mr. Friendly's" laugh was pretty damn spooky.

Unfortunately, by Season 2 Michael was like a robot that could only scream and moan about his son and all the respect and empathy I had built up for him over the first season got blown out like the "smoke monster" erupting from my hienie. Then he finally went psycho and killed off Ana Lucia, who didn't serve much of a purpose at that point, and Libby, who was just becoming interesting, and then he ran off again with Walt. Good riddance, I thought at the time.

But by now you've probably heard how Michael will return as a full cast member in Season 4. One big question now is whether Michael will play his part in the "present" or the "flash future" or both. Of course, there's also the possibility that Michael was the body in the coffin which would also account for Kate's dismissal of him, though like I said before there are simply too many variables to settle on just one dead body definitively.

My guess is that Michael will return to the island in the "present" because the flash forwards, and even the flash backs (I've read they'll both be in Season 4), won't offer enough air-time to warrant full time cast membership. In storyline terms, Michael will probably be messed up emotionally and I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that Walt died or that they're somehow separated again because if Michael and Walt are together, then Michael would have nothing to do with the other "losties." Something is going to have to drive him back into the lives of Jack and Kate and that something has to be big to reunite a guy with the people he sold out and left for dead.

Biggest Questions: What has Michael been doing since he left the island? What will he do when he comes back, wherever, and whenever, that might be? Will he ever shut up about Walt?

Don't worry ladies, I'll post a pic of Paulo in a thong or something

Nikki Fernandez - Nikki is my personal, hands-down winner for hottest Lost castaway. Sure she was a greedy, manipulative she-dog of a woman, but what a great looking she-dog she was.

I watched Season 3 in maybe three or four days, so I didn't have an issue with her and Paulo's sudden appearance on the island though I can understand the regular audience's anger. Everyone must have felt they were wasting time on these newcomers while more important mysteries remained unsolved and more important relationships remained unconsummated (that's you again, Kate and Jack).

I did enjoy Nikki and Paolo's death episode if for no other reason than we got a short breather from the heaviness of the other island mysteries. Seeing Nikki in a sequined bikini didn't hurt either. I thought her death was very Edgar Allen Poe-ish and it felt almost satisfying to see the "Losties" killing somebody else for a change, even if it was one of their own.

Biggest Questions: Will anybody else on Lost wear a bikini as well as Nikki did?

[More to come]

Bring it on Lost

I finished watching the first three seasons of Lost as of last night. Wow. Wow. Wow.

I've been busily reading up on fan theories to see what other people predict for Season 4 and I plan to write up a lot of my own thoughts on what's happened so far and what I expect to see in the future. But first I have a couple more applications to finish.

Don't you hate it when planning for your future gets in the way of the really important stuff like theorizing about a television show?

Do Kate and Jack return to the Island? Who cares?!? I want to know about the four-toed broken statue

Getting lost in Lost

Possible alternate title: Confused

Let's see, my application for Columbia is due in less than 48 hours which gives me almost enough time to watch the rest of Lost if I don't sleep, eat, or forgo my urine bucket.

Rest assured I'll eventually finish my application (two down already, three more to go), but I'm still blasting through Lost episodes faster than Britney Spears' child custody lawyer can say "I quit."

I just finished the 11th episode of Lost and here are a few of my observations on the series so far. Feel free to agree, disagree, or call me stupid -- just don't spoil anything for me. It should go without saying that I'll be spoiling things for anybody who hasn't watched the show.

Observations

-According to IMDB, Matthew Fox was born in Pennsylvania but doesn't his accent sound Canadian at times? This is one of my biggest peeves of the show because nobody can be a leader sounding like a Canuck, much less organize and rally the survivors of an airplane crash on a remote tropical paradise while talking like a Bob and Doug McKenzie skit (that's right, I went there).

-My favorite characters in no particular order: Hurley, because he pulls off the stereotypical funny large man very well. Locke, because he has the kind of cool vertical eye-scar that plastic surgery just can't provide. Sawyer, for his backstory that was by far the most interesting, partly because I didn't know anything about it and partly because he has a bonafide personality that is complex without relying on Matthew Fox's constant wild-eyed craziness to emote "passion."

-In the last episode, All the Best Cowboys have Daddy Issues, Jack and co. failed to rescue Claire but managed to save Charlie's life after he was hung from a tree. Call me crazy, but why would anyone try to stop a doctor from saving somebody's life? I realize it's improbable to resuscitate somebody after they've been hung for who knows how long, but what do you have to lose by trying? Absolutely friggin' nothing. *Cry* *Cry* "Stop trying to save Charlie's life Jack. It's making me too sad. *Cry* *Cry* -- In the words of a large black woman, "Woman, please."

-Watching Jin act like a doting suitor to Sun in their flashback episode was difficult. That dude just looks mean.

-Who's the most attractive Lost castaway? First of all, this could be a post in and of itself, and maybe I'll do that once I see the cast size increase (I know about the "Others"). The obvious choice would be Shannon since she's blonde and hot, but I'd have to throw Claire and Sun up there too for their Australian charm and appealing submissiveness (just kidding, kind of), respectively. I'll leave the male castaway comparisons to any female (or curious male) readers out there.

Is Claire the hottest Lost castaway? Excuse me while I consult with my crotch

-Favorite Episode? It's hard not to cheat and just pick the two part Pilot, but I'm going with Claire's flashback episode, Raised by Another. I didn't necessarily like her dream terrors, but the deal with the psychic was otherworldly in a manner that meshed with the creeping supernaturalism at Lost's core. But the real reason I liked that episode was for the final few minutes when Hurley announces that Ethan wasn't on the flight manifest. That was one damn good bombshell.

Somebody made a figurine of Shannon. Apparently I'm not the only one with messed up priorities

Okay, I'm off to watch another episode before hitting the sack and getting back on that Columbia application. Did you know Matthew Fox graduated from Columbia University? I'm no psychic but that seems like a pretty good omen.

Catch you all later.

Lost Appeal

I still don't have cable and my next movie review (Persepolis) is still percolating in my brain, but ABC has finally given me something to write about by putting all 3 seasons of Lost on their network website.

I know as much about the series as anyone can without watching more than twenty minutes or doing a single Google search and even with my cobbled-together expectations I was still impressed with the pilot episode (part 1 at least -- I haven't seen part 2 yet).

I can see why Lost was such a phenomenon; this is a show that takes a unique premise and owns it. Primal themes like death, survival, and compassion are eloquently put into a visual language that is startlingly original. I know Lost has been written about and theorized to death so I won't go into that, but this show doesn't resemble anything I've ever seen. You can't say that about very many programs these days.

A couple of scenes stood out for me and neatly exemplify what I find so appealing about the show. The first was when Kate slips a dead passenger's shoes off to wear into the island's jungle. She does so almost reverently and, as a viewer, the experience goes from "Cool, they're stuck on an island" to "Holy sh*t, she's stealing shoes from a dead guy to survive." I love those small human touches that add a huge measure of authenticity. That particular scene gets even better when Kate glances at Locke's grim face and he smiles around an orange peel in an attempt to cheer her up. Except Kate isn't a little girl that such a gesture would work on, and both lapse into dark moods that are even more somber than before as a result of Locke's clumsy gesture. Just one more example of superb storytelling.

The jury is still out on Matthew Fox in the lead role of Jack. His absolute lack of charisma could be calculated since he seems like the "everyman" type of guy that viewers are supposed to relate to. Or he's just not that interesting a guy. On the one hand, I loved his character's introduction and how long it took him to snap out of his airplane-crash fugue before helping the other survivors. During his initial hazy march you had to wonder if he was just going to ignore his fellow survivors and take care of himself first. You could literally watch his character and personality take shape right before your eyes in the most immediate and definitive manner. I just hope he becomes a more complicated character down the road.

I generally prefer watching serial shows like Lost on dvd but ABC.com's arrangement is nearly as convenient. It's only the first (half of the first) episode, but consider me hooked.

Two weeks already?

Time sure flies when you've got tests to take, essays to write, two jobs to do, visiting parents to entertain, and a sickness to suffer from. Not that I'm complaining, mind you. Oh wait, yes I am. I AM complaining.

One good thing did come from being sick in bed for two straight days. I saw the un-aired pilot for the television series Wonderfalls which I stumbled upon because it featured Lee Pace of Pushing Daisies fame. Mr. Pace has a much smaller role in Wonderfalls and unfortunately I've only been able to locate the un-aired pilot on youtube which actually features a different actor in his role. Oh well.

Wonderfalls takes place near Niagara Falls -- go figure. A young girl (I'm too tired to look up her name) works in a souvenir shop and suffers from what she describes as a case of being "overeducated and unemployable." In other words, she's a a smart-alecky, tarty mouth and completely apathetic about her direction-less life. I'm sure many of us can relate. However, unlike most of us (I think), this girl starts to hear voices from different items throughout her store which tell her to do things. It's quirky and untraditional and I can see how networks were afraid to keep it on the air for much longer than it's original four episodes (twelve were filmed in total and they're all available on dvd).

If you want some quirkiness, check out the pilot. I'll post it here for your convenience.

More Television!

Sorry for the paucity of updates, but for the past week or so I've been caught between a rock and the GREs. I'm taking the test Monday (so wish me luck) and after that I've got five other applications to finish up by the end of the month. Not to mention my ongoing internship and my new job I started two weeks ago. Whew.

And even with all that, I've procrastinated by managed to get some quality television time on my computer.

Here are a few updates:

NBC.com shows

Heroes - You may have heard that Heroes creator Tim Kring apologized for the poor storylines and unremarkable romances on the show's second season. But even with the recycled plots and meandering relationships, I still find the series makes me wonder what will happen next. (Especially the most recent episode.) For another perspective on the show, check out the staff commentary where different cast members (actors, writers, directors, etc.) take turns commenting on the most recent episodes while they play on a different screen. I personally liked the commentary from HRG (Claire's dad).

The Office - The Office's cancellation is the biggest reason why I want the writer's strike to end. Must have new episodes. Pleeaaaase.

30 Rock - Tina Fey and co. have really hit their stride, just when everything is getting shut down. The show has really moved away from the whole "behind the scenes" perspective of a comedy production and is now focusing on the quirky characters that have already been established, namely Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin's brilliant characters. Tracy Morgan has slowly grown on me and Jane (whatever her last name is) has become possibly the most hilarious supporting actress on television. Please don't go 30 Rock! Also, check out Tina Fey's videos where she reads viewer's comments. They're hilarious.

Chuck - I really want to like this show. I like the actors, I like the concept, and I like the style. But for some reason, it all hasn't come together for me. The show continues to focus on the Chuck-Sarah relationship and I can understand the direction but the execution feels so tired and played out. It's like watching Lois and Clark all over again. Plus, I wish Chuck would be a little more manly sometimes.

ABC.com shows

Pushing Daisies - From the first episode I feared that Pushing Daisies would become either too gushy or lose it's "magical" aura. Thankfully, it's pulled off the near impossible and done neither. I credit the strong and diverse cast of characters for the show's balance and consistency. And did you see the bombshell at the end of the last episode? I can't wait to see what Chuck does. This is probably my favorite show on internets-television right now.

Samantho Who? - I've always been a fan of Christina Applegate so I took a gander at her newest show. It could've been called The Christina Applegate show: With Amnesia. I only saw a couple of shows and it's neither fantastic nor awful. Christina's better than this, but it's still halfway decent.