The Spoon

Life Free or Die Hard of Shame

While I was on my way to a clothing store today, my little brain idly wondered if I'd once again run into the same gay asian dude who works there. I have nothing against gay asian dudes or any combination thereof, but this particular gay asian dude had been both very helpful in the past and also a little too forward if you know what I mean. And I think you do.

As soon as I entered the store, I immediately conducted a code yellow reconnaissance sweep for the GAD (gay asian dude) to assess the necessity for evasive maneuvers. I sneaked my way to the back of the store unobserved but the GAD was sneakier and ambushed me from a rear employee door. At this point I temporarily lost control of my body, which proceeded to give the gay asian dude a very unmasculine, sideways, "ta-ta" hello wave. I think the guy said hello back to me but I can't be too sure since I was busy scuttling away. I still bought a shirt, but I have yet to forgive my arm for disobeying orders in a time of crisis.

Oh yeah, I also saw Die Hard 4.